“Am I Too Much for You?”

 

Do you ever wonder if you’re too much for those you love? Do you ever worry that you will burden them? Do you ever feel that your loved ones already have enough on their plate to be concerned about your upsets? These are probably feelings that we all have from time to time. We feel it is better to hold in our upset feelings rather than take a chance that we might further burden our friends or partner.

 

Two women friends came to a workshop of ours. These two single women had been best friends for a long time and really seemed more like twin sisters than friends. They cared and loved each other very much. Because they each held very responsible jobs many miles from each other, they only saw one another several times a year. But they talked on the phone every day, sometimes for just a few minutes. They also worried about one another. They worried that the current boy friend was not the right one. They worried that the other was working too hard or not in good enough health.  Their relationship to one another was very touching to the rest of us in the workshop.

 

Don't Hold Back

When I was twenty-seven years old, a woman friend became frustrated with how much
love and attention I was giving Barry, my husband of five years. She was a
teacher of women’s studies at a local college. This subject was brand new in
1973 and emphasized women’s liberation. She saw my devotion to Barry as old
fashioned and “unliberated.” In a burst of anger she said, “You’re putting all
your eggs in one basket. Barry is going to die someday and then you’ll be sorry
you concentrated so much love on him.”

From Disappointment to Service

Have you ever noticed how a disappointment can really be a blessing in disguise? We had an experience of this recently while returning home from our three week work trip in Europe. We had just left Assisi, Italy, where we had led a retreat with our musician friend Charley Thweatt. During the week, besides the normal workshop activities, we walked in the footsteps of St. Francis as we visited various very sacred places where he had been. St. Francis was a master of letting go of plans and looking for ways to be of service to people, animals and the earth. I wanted to be more like him and felt so inspired leaving Assisi.

Healing Words

“Healing Words”

Everyone has unique words they need to hear. These words are like a magic sound to their
ears, for they have perhaps longed to hear them all of their lives. The important thing in our relationships is to find out what our loved ones most need to hear, and then give these messages as often as possible.

“What Saint Francis is Teaching Me”

Ever since seeing the Franco Zeffirelli movie, “Brother Sun, Sister
Moon,” when first released in 1973, Joyce and I have been fascinated by
Saint Francis of Assisi. Never before or since have I been so affected by a
movie. When I left the movie theater, I felt ready to give away all my
possessions – actually, I had very few possessions at the time; I was a
resident in psychiatry. But still, Joyce was sympathetic yet more rational
than me when I shared my radical intentions. “Barry,” she said with
gentle love in her voice, “Perhaps there’s a way to live simply and in
peace without becoming homeless.”

“The Power of Gratitude to Change Our Lives”

Barry and I have just returned from Assisi, Italy, where we led our second week long retreat with musician and friend, Charley Thweatt. Similar to last year, the retreat in Assisi was life-changing for both of us. Assisi, the home of St. Francis and St. Clare, is a very inspiring place and lends itself to inner reflection and a desire to create a more fulfilling life.

Are You Vulnerability-Challenged?

So many people struggle with their relationships. For many people, intimacy is a foreign language. And vulnerability … forget it! Show your partner your weakness, fear, pain, need for love? No way! That’ll make you look pathetic.