From Disappointment to Service

Have you ever noticed how a disappointment can really be a blessing in disguise? We had an experience of this recently while returning home from our three week work trip in Europe. We had just left Assisi, Italy, where we had led a retreat with our musician friend Charley Thweatt. During the week, besides the normal workshop activities, we walked in the footsteps of St. Francis as we visited various very sacred places where he had been. St. Francis was a master of letting go of plans and looking for ways to be of service to people, animals and the earth. I wanted to be more like him and felt so inspired leaving Assisi.

Healing Words

“Healing Words”

Everyone has unique words they need to hear. These words are like a magic sound to their
ears, for they have perhaps longed to hear them all of their lives. The important thing in our relationships is to find out what our loved ones most need to hear, and then give these messages as often as possible.

“What Saint Francis is Teaching Me”

Ever since seeing the Franco Zeffirelli movie, “Brother Sun, Sister
Moon,” when first released in 1973, Joyce and I have been fascinated by
Saint Francis of Assisi. Never before or since have I been so affected by a
movie. When I left the movie theater, I felt ready to give away all my
possessions – actually, I had very few possessions at the time; I was a
resident in psychiatry. But still, Joyce was sympathetic yet more rational
than me when I shared my radical intentions. “Barry,” she said with
gentle love in her voice, “Perhaps there’s a way to live simply and in
peace without becoming homeless.”

“The Power of Gratitude to Change Our Lives”

Barry and I have just returned from Assisi, Italy, where we led our second week long retreat with musician and friend, Charley Thweatt. Similar to last year, the retreat in Assisi was life-changing for both of us. Assisi, the home of St. Francis and St. Clare, is a very inspiring place and lends itself to inner reflection and a desire to create a more fulfilling life.

Are You Vulnerability-Challenged?

So many people struggle with their relationships. For many people, intimacy is a foreign language. And vulnerability … forget it! Show your partner your weakness, fear, pain, need for love? No way! That’ll make you look pathetic.

Pray-Mates

People often ask us, "What is the single most important practice a couple can do for their relationship?" Certainly we have our favorites, like appreciation, inner-parent/inner child balancing, honest communication of feelings, asking for and giving forgiveness, and taking responsibility for our projections. But the most important thing we can do is to find a way to strengthen our spiritual connection, both inside ourselves and with our partner. 

The Real Bucket List

Once in a while, a person will have a defining moment -- an experience -- a bit of wisdom or inspiration that pops into their heads and hearts and changes their lives.  I had one of those moments recently on the Rogue River in Oregon. It helped to change in a very positive way my relationship with Barry, my beloved of 46 years.